I am tired of fighting, fighting, fighting and going nowhere. I can’t afford to go nowhere anymore. But I tell myself to keep fighting because who knows when this will all turn around, and suddenly I’ll be where I’m supposed to be. I’m so desperate, that if the lesser is offered to me this week, I think I will take it because it will be good enough. Why continue to live at 33% for who knows how much longer, when I can live at 90%? Is it really worth the wait for 100%?
Some people will say, yes, just wait for it. On my better days, I say, yes, just wait for it. But this is not one of my better days, or weeks, or months, and I have waited and fought just long enough that I no longer care too much.
I’d rather have the better, I would, but what if it never comes?