I’ve had to let something go in order to keep my faith in Jesus.
I’m not referring to the things we normally talk about when we discuss following Jesus – you know, the works of the flesh or the sacrifices we have to make in carrying our crosses. I’ve had to let go of something far more orthodox – that is, something most Christians consider fundamental to following Jesus and their faith in Him.
But as I’ve dealt with certain doubts since my preteen years, and as these doubts have escalated to critical levels this year, this thing could not be less fundamental to my faith in Jesus as Savior from sin and the way to the Heavenly Father. In fact, as things have boiled down, I’ve discovered I can either have faith in this one tenet and let Jesus go, or I can have faith in Jesus and let this one tenet go, but I will not be able to hang on to both.
And since Jesus is the best thing that’s ever happened to me, and this particular tenet – well, it’s been one of the worst, I’m going to stick with Jesus.
I’m breaking the rules, I know. It’s supposed to be all or nothing, I know. I’ve seen individual faiths crumble because people thought they had to believe both, or neither, okay? Because in a situation where people are forced to choose both or neither, they inevitably choose neither. I’ve decided that’s not going to be my story, so I’m going take Jesus, and leave the rest.
I believe God can be entirely known through Jesus, and Jesus alone, because Jesus is God. I believe absolutely everything must be filtered through Jesus, because Jesus is the Word of God – if it stands in Him, it stands, if it falls in Him, it falls. Jesus is my final authority.
Which is, as a Christian (literal meaning, “little Christ”), exactly as it should be, in my opinion. (Again, orthodox Christianity disagrees with me.)
So, yes, I’ve had to let something go in order to keep my faith in Jesus. And, yes, I know it puts me at odds with most people I know. And talking about it publicly?
I’ll probably get multiple calls from multiple people.
I’ll probably get called multiple names by multiple people.
Multiple people are probably going to lose all respect for me, because their respect for me has been on the basis of my grasp of this one tenet.
I’m probably not going to be allowed to minister in certain capacities.
If I don’t fall in with orthodoxy, I’m probably going to be treated a certain way by the Church.
But I’m not going to pretend – not for my own comfort, and not for anyone else’s – and I can certainly handle what comes as a result.
Oh, yes, I’ve let something go in order to keep my faith in Jesus.
And I’m not ashamed or afraid, because I’ve kept the most important thing: Jesus.